"I have a need for speed. But only as much speed as you can get without bending your knee."
— US Champion Racewalker
"But Iraqi gun enthusiasts have defended firearms, saying 'Laser-guided ground-to-air shoulder-mounted rocket launchers don't kill people, the American-Zionist conspiracy kills people.'"
— The Chaser's War on Everything
“Visitors are informed that in the United Kingdom traffic drives on the left-hand side of the road. In the interests of safety, you are advised to practise this in your country of origin for a week or two before driving in the UK.”
— United Kingdom Ministry of Transport
"I love California, I practically grew up in Phoenix."
"Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children."
"Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child."
"We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur."
— Vice President Dan Quayle
"A gratuitous explosion of vainglory and guts, the movie is all firecrackers and giblets and broken glass. The overall effect is like wading through hospital waste."
— a review of the movie Total Recall by Rita Kempley in The Washington Post