EEng
This is an old revision of this page, as edited by EEng (talk | contribs) at 02:31, 5 September 2019 (→Alle-wiki-gory: tristram shandy). The present address (URL) is a permanent link to this revision, which may differ significantly from the current revision.
- A message for visitors: For performance reasons some of the more image-heavy exhibits have been moved to User:EEng/Museum Annex. The Annex is free and open to the public.

Your season tickets to The Museums are valid at WP:AE. Userbox by Ritchie333[11].
If only it were so...
- From a discussion at AN:
"This episode, to my mind highlights a very big flaw in the functioning of wikipedia. Namely, that certain users who have an elevated status: 'admins' are able to act without impunity."
- "His primary achievement has been in confusing the public mind."
- "Little did I dream you could be so reckless, and so cruel ... You've done enough. Have you no sense of decency, sir, at long last? Have you left no sense of decency?"
- "Every time I read the paper / those old feelings come on
We are waist deep in the Big Muddy / and the big fool says to push on."
This userbox unintentionally left blank. |
![]() | This user has opted out of revert notifications. You should, too! |
![]() |
This user has been blocked several times, and isn't embarrassed about it - (admire my block log here!). |
This editor was nominated for deletion in September 2016. The consensus of the discussion was he's speedy. |
You need a de-stress technique.
Sip tea with biscotti,
go fish – try karate.
But edit war? Blocked for a week!
Levivich (adapted)
Resources offered:
- I will be happy to supply, for use in developing articles, materials cataloged here (digital materials are easy, scans of hardcopies may take some time).
Because some have asked...
- The material on this page is meant to increase other editors' pleasure in contributing (by providing modest amusement they can enjoy during breaks from editing) or to assist them in becoming more effective editors (by illustrating various aspects of Wikipedia as a social environment e.g. [12])
In humor based on political events, Democratic figures are featured as well as Republican (e.g. [13]) though unfortunately the former opportunities don't arise very often, because e.g. Clinton and Obama just aren't as amusing as the Republican nominee.Note: This wing of the Museums temporarily closed pending approval by the castigatores of such material as is conducive to the regimen morum.
WikiProject Department of Fun | (Rated NA-class, Bottom-importance) | ||||||||||
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
|
- For more information about Bottom-importance, see also the top of User talk:EEng. The top, not the bottom.
Museum of Distorted Quotations Taken Out Of Context
—Primergrey (via C.S. Lewis)[20]
—FlightTime[21], see also [22]
—Donald Trump[23]
—BushelCandle[25]
—CrowsNest[27]
What the Critics Are Saying
a.k.a.
I'm not a professor of neuroscience (but apparently I play one on Wikipedia)
—"Erika Herzog" (and see [42])
—Reyk
The Barnstar of Good Humor | |
I haven't checked out your userpage in a long while, but I laughed so hard (I particularly liked the "head in the sand" picture) I nearly snorted coffee out of my nose. PS: I would like to apologise for being tempted to go to the dark side.... Ritchie333 (talk) (cont) 12:30, 20 March 2015 (UTC) |
The Rather Unusual User Page Award | |
Not sure what my definition of a "rather usual" userpage would be, but it wouldn't be that.[46] |
"This is a very long page."[47]
The Barnstar of Good Humor | ||
For your medicine against chronic wikidespair. Consult your doctor before trying this medicine. Symptoms include: a systemic allergic reaction, a worsening of withdrawal symptoms for not placing {{ANI-notice}} in months, and casting the first stone.[48] |
"childish and irresponsible"[49]
No barnstar is better than this barnstar, believe me!
The Donald Trump Barnstar | ||
Your userpage is hilarious. MB298 (talk) 00:17, 30 October 2016 (UTC) |
The Barnstar of Good Humor | |
Your new gallery made me laugh even harder than the admittedly rambunctious Trump Museums. Astonishing, flabbergasting, yyuuuge!!! — JFG talk 20:14, 20 December 2016 (UTC) |
— Hugh Quigley, The Irish race in California and on the Pacific Coast: with an introductory historical dissertation on the principal races of mankind, and a vocabulary of ancient and modern Irish family names (1878)
— Great Trans-Continental Railway Guide (Crofutt & Eaton, 1870)
User essays worth reading
Ode to ANI
One fine day in the middle of the night, / Two dead boys got up to fight,
Back to back they faced each other, / Drew their swords and shot each other,
One was blind and the other couldn’t, see / So they chose a dummy for a referee.
A blind man went to see fair play, / A dumb man went to shout “hooray!”
A paralysed donkey passing by, / Kicked the blind man in the eye,
Knocked him through a nine inch wall, / Into a dry ditch and drowned them all,
A deaf policeman heard the noise, / And came to arrest the two dead boys,
If you don’t believe this story’s true, / Ask the blind man he saw it too!
Some Entertaining Diversions
- Thanks to Softlavender, we learn that Hollywood predicted Wikipedia sixty years in advance, complete with vanity articles: Click here. "Human enlightenment—what nonsense, Professor!"
Don't call names, you lumpish rump-fed bladder!
You have been noticed using opprobrious epithets. It's payback time from the Shakespeare Insult Generator! To activate the Insultspout and receive fresh insults, click here. Note that all insults generated by the Spout are guaranteed literary and cultured, unlike the nasty things you said, you bawdy base-court vassal.
See also this burst of creativity.
Welcome, new editors!
Give it a click. But warning – huge file!
WikiBingo
- Devised by Ian.thomson
Below you will find a randomly generated Wikipedia bingo card, and a key explaining the behaviors behind each entry. While handling one or more users, mark off which behaviors are displayed. If you get five in a row horizontally, diagonally (from corner to corner), or vertically, you've won! During a talk-page discussion you can use the {{Bingo-win}} template to announce you've won.
Refresh card as often as desired:
B | I | N | G | O |
---|---|---|---|---|
Quackery[45] |
Anti-Christian[49] |
"Not" racist[56] |
||
Plagiarism[47] |
||||
Crybaby[29] |
Free space[81] |
Word of God[4] |
||
(Un)reliability[21] |
Illuminatus[69] |
To the lions![60] |
||
Spam, spam, spam, spam[46] |
Gov't agent[42] |
Intelligent design[71] |
Key
A Little History
The userbox below was considered for deletion on February 6, 2015. The result of the "discussion" was "We can allow tiny pockets of dissent, as long as it doesn't catch on. Now back to the salt mines!". |
It has been 2256 days since a userbox was last urgently removed from this page based on a three-hour "consensus" at ANI. |
- When users do something that administrators don't like, but when the users not only disagree but have the temerity to object to the sanctions levied against them by administrators, is this an unacceptable dissent against the powers-that-be that must, always, be quashed by any means necessary?
- I'm probably hyperbolizing here, but I think this is how the issue appears to the EEng's of the world. And some, at least, of the EEng's of the world are here to help build the encyclopedia. We say "The free encyclopedia that anyone can edit", not "The benevolent dictatorship encyclopedia that docile and compliant rule-followers can edit as long as they remember their place and are always properly respectful towards ADMINISTRATORS." So, please, if that's not the message you want to send, just let these userboxes go. And if you want to boot a user off the project for not being here to help build the encyclopedia, please do it for a more substantive reason than that the user refuses to say "Uncle" when confronted by admins.
- —Steve Summit (talk) 19:46, 6 February 2015 (UTC) [51]
- And finally, to each admin who says, "Well, I wouldn't have blocked, but I don't feel like overturning it": what you're condoning is a situation in which every editor is at the mercy of the least restrained, most trigger-happy admin who happens to stumble into any given situation. Don't you see how corrosive that is? It's like all these recent US police shootings: no matter how blatantly revolting an officer's actions were, the monolithic reply is "It was by the book. Case closed." This [admin] was way out of line from the beginning in deleting multiple editors' posts (as someone suggested, hatting would have made complete sense, and troubled me not at all) and when called on it above, he gives a middle-finger-raised LOL. No wonder so many see haughty arrogance in much of the admin corps around here.
- —EEng 05:38, 16 January 2015 (UTC) [52]
And let me be clear: I have no problem with 97% of admins, who do noble work in return for (generally) either no recognition or shitloads of grief, only occasionally punctuated by thanks. But the other 3%—whoa, boy, watch out!
- —EEng 20:02, 6 February 2015 (UTC) [53]
First annual caption contest
Click here and contribute your own.
EEng's half-serious list of topics on which WP should just drop all coverage as not worth the drama
- Professional wrestling: WP:General_sanctions/Professional_wrestling
- Footy players
- Beauty pageants
- Music genres
- Pornstars
- Anything related to Ru Paul
- Video games
- Japanese comics and animation
- Snooker
- Cricket
- Catalan separatism
Dopey words that should never appear in articles
- Hail, as in
All the victims appeared to hail from the lower class of society
orMusic historian Bob Gulla hailed it as an "iconoclastic funk-rock" record.
God, that sounds stupid. - Accolades, as in List of accolades received by The Avengers (2012 film).
- Garner, as in
garnered worldwide recognition for her portrayal
. (The same article goes on to make us vomit by saying a bunch of people wereawarded the Outstanding Performance by an Ensemble in a Drama Series accolade
.) - Berth (except on ships), as in
garnered a playoff berth
.
Violators will be subject to initial 24-hour blocks, with escalating blocks for subsequent infractions.
Alle-wiki-gory
Carp per diem
Some poetry from Atsme:
A satirist I'm not, |
References
- ^ Nowadays everything's "infused".
Model: Wikipedia editor "A Man Inverts"
- The next three images gratefully stolen from Catherine de Burgh
Formerly "Please comment on Talk:List of forestry journals".
I am not making these up.
A video clip for use at ANI someday.
Desirable and undesirable kinds of editors:
- I am wounded in dignity only, Whitaker Walt
- For God's sake we've got to get organized!
- Why is it we can't learn to live together?
- Tristram Shandy
Wikipedia is not about whining
This is an essay. It contains the advice or opinions of one or more Wikipedia contributors. This page is not an encyclopedia article, nor is it one of Wikipedia's policies or guidelines, as it has not been thoroughly vetted by the community. Some essays represent widespread norms; others only represent minority viewpoints. |
This page in a nutshell: Wikipedia is all about teamwork. Editors must work together to build a reliable encyclopedia, not whine all the time. While complaining is sometimes appropriate, and a glass of wine may sometimes ease tensions, neither of these is central to the purpose of Wikipedia. |
Wikipedia is not about whining. Complaining about editor behavior is appropriate – at a relevant noticeboard when that behavior is contrary to Wikipedia policies and guidelines and harms the project. But editors should not complain just for the sake of complaining, nor as therapy or catharsis, but to get help in guiding an errant editor back on track with the project's fundamental principles.
If you find yourself complaining more than contributing, it might be time for a short wikibreak to clear your mind, rethink your approach, and help you come back ready to resume building the encyclopedia.
In cases of habitual or sustained whining, admins may hand out cool-down bocks.
Incidentally, Wikipedia is also not about wining. A glass of Lambrusco is not a reliable source, too much original research in this area may lead to habitually editing under the influence, and indefinite bocks could lead to an indefinite block. That doesn't mean, however, that the occasional pint can't help reduce wikistress, as long as editors don't become a wikiholic. This can lead to serious problems including wikihomelessness, which is of course the opposite of being a Wikipedian in residence.
This is an essay on concise, uncluttered writing. It contains the advice or opinions of one or more Wikipedia contributors. This page is not an encyclopedia article, nor is it one of Wikipedia's policies or guidelines, as it has not been thoroughly vetted by the community. Some essays represent widespread norms; others only represent minority viewpoints. |
This page in a nutshell: The Principle of least astonishment notwithstanding, strive to omit obvious details. |
Principle of Some Astonishment
— William Strunk Jr., The Elements of Style (1918)
— If Zinsser followed his own advice
— Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, Wind, Sand and Stars (tr. Lewis Galantière)
— Blaise Pascal, Lettres provinciales no. 16 (1657)
Portions of this page are best viewed in desktop mode. Mobile readers, click here.
Sometimes editors clutter their prose with pedestrian details that the reader likely already knows or would naturally assume. Rather than informing readers, this wastes their time and dulls their attention. The following are examples of articles belaboring the routine and obvious, at times painfully:
- In the article Pick-up sticks:
-
Each piece in the game also has a point value, with more challenging pieces being worth more.
At the end of play, points are tallied up and the pieces can be thrown again or stored in a container for another use.
- Comment: Of course the points are tallied up at the end of play. Of course we can either play again or put the game away "in a container". (If the rules said to ignore the score sheet at the end, then called for players to burn the game pieces or use them to commit ritual suicide, THAT would be worth mentioning.)
- In the article Notre-Dame de Paris fire:
-
Some lead joints in stained glass windows melted
in the heat of the fire.
- Comment: DUH.
- In the article Live-line working
-
Electricity is hazardous
- Comment: Shocking.
- In the article Joe Biden
-
Joseph Robinette Biden Jr. is
an American politician andthe president-elect of the United States.
- Comment: